Tag: empowered birth after trauma

Your birth trauma is real. Sadly, the UK maternity system is under huge strain. Induction, caesarean and assisted birth rates are rising – and so is the number of parents experiencing birth trauma.

What is birth trauma (postnatal PTSD)?

There are four main symptoms:

• Avoidance: avoiding anything or anyone that reminds you of the trauma – for example, other parents with babies, or going to (or past) the place where you gave birth.
• Re-experiencing: reliving the traumatic event through nightmares, flashbacks or intrusive memories that make you feel panicky or distressed.
• Hypervigilance: feeling constantly on alert, jumpy and irritable, or worried that something bad will happen to your baby.
• Low mood: feeling low and unhappy, or guilty and blaming yourself for your birth experience. You may also find it hard to remember parts of the birth.

Not everyone who has a traumatic experience develops PTSD, but it is a common response to trauma. It’s involuntary – you can’t help it, and it can’t be cured by “snapping out of it” or “focusing on the positive”.

Perhaps you’re reading this because your birth trauma is stopping you (and/or your partner) from trying for another baby? Or because people keep telling you to “snap out of it”? Or maybe you can’t sleep, or feel you can’t bond with your baby, because of your birth experience?

You are not alone. Your birth trauma is real. Research shows that around 4–5% of people who give birth develop PTSD – and fathers and partners can develop PTSD after witnessing a traumatic birth, too.

How can you get help with birth trauma?

The Birth Trauma Association (BTA) explains where and how to get help, including their peer support and how to access psychological support. You could talk to professionals such as:

• your GP
• your midwife
• your health visitor
• a counsellor

Or to people you trust, such as:

• family and friends
• the BTA’s volunteer supporters, by emailing support@birthtraumaassociation.org.uk
• other parents through the BTA’s peer support network

There may be families near you who have also experienced birth trauma and would be happy to share their experiences – the BTA can help you find local volunteers and peers.

Another wonderfully supportive option is Sheryl, the Healing Birth Doula, who offers online learning including her Birth Empowerment course.

Pregnant again after birth trauma?

If you’re pregnant again after a traumatic birth, here are some ideas to help you enjoy your pregnancy and start looking forward to meeting your baby.

There’s no quick fix, but there are plenty of options – and it’s important to talk to someone. A trauma-informed doula or hypnobirthing practitioner can work with you on what happened last time, help you find closure, and then help you plan for this new birth. A practitioner trained in the rewind technique (a gentle therapy for processing traumatic memories) may also help you heal.

In short:

• work through your previous birth (for example, with the rewind technique)
• acknowledge that it is in the past
• find closure for your previous birth
• acknowledge that this is a completely new baby and a new experience
• start writing down your birth preferences and “what if” ideas
• start to look forward to your new birth experience

Your steps towards an empowered birth experience are shown in the image below. You may also find my post Pregnant again helpful.

My online course to help you prepare for your baby’s birth