The emotional rollercoaster of parenthood

The emotional rollercoaster of parenthood is just that; a very steep and fast rollercoaster full of emotions and ups and downs.

Parenthood is truly a remarkable journey, filled with countless highs and lows, twists and turns. From the moment you hold your newborn baby in your arms for the first time, a rush of emotions comes over you. The mix of joy, excitement, and overwhelming love that soaks into every fibre of your being is indescribable. It is as if your heart has expanded to accommodate a depth of emotion you never knew existed.

For some new parents, the rush of true love and emotions for their newborn baby may not be instant but take quite some time instead.

Yet, parenthood is also like embarking on an unpredictable emotional rollercoaster ride. Just as the coaster climbs slowly to its peak before plummeting down, parenthood takes you through exhilarating highs and heart-wrenching lows. One moment, you may be enjoying the tender moments shared with your child, watching them explore the world with wide-eyed curiosity and innocence. And in the next moment, you find yourself not coping with the challenges and difficulties that come with raising a child.

There are sleepless nights when you soothe a crying baby, trying everything in your power to calm their little soul. The moments of pure exhaustion and self-doubt, wondering if you are doing enough for your child. Furthermore, there are the days when the juggling act of work, household chores, and family & friends commitments feels overwhelming, leaving you stretched thin and emotionally drained.

Yet, amidst the chaos and the challenges, there are the magical moments that make it all worthwhile:

• Your baby’s first steps, the first words, the first toothless smiles that light up your world.
• The pride that fills your heart when your child achieves a milestone or overcomes a hurdle.
• The unconditional love that flows between you and your little one, creating a bond that is unbreakable.

Parenthood is a rollercoaster ride that tests your patience, resilience, and strength. It tests your relationship with your partner, friends and family. It pushes you and your relationship to your limits and challenges your beliefs about yourself and the world. But it also unveils a depth of love and selflessness that is unparalleled. Parenthood teaches you to be selfless, to sacrifice, and to prioritize the needs of another human being above your own.

By becoming a parent is a profound transformation. Alongside the immense happiness and love that parenthood brings, there is a simultaneous experience of loss, particularly in relation to your identity.

When you become a parent, there’s a natural shift in focus from your own individuality to the well-being and development of your child. This transition can be both beautiful and challenging. Suddenly, the roles and responsibilities you once held in your career, relationships, and even time-consuming hobbies transform and adapt to the new demands and challenges of parenthood.

The process of becoming a parent often entails redefining who you are and discovering new aspects of yourself. As you navigate through the ups and downs of parenting, you will encounter a multitude of changes in your life. Priorities realign, relationships evolve, and personal growth takes on a new dimension.

In this journey, you not only learn how to care for and nurture another human being, but you also acquire a myriad of new skills and experience a range of emotions you may have never encountered before. From sleepless nights to first steps, from profound moments of connection to the challenges of discipline, each moment shapes you and your identity as a parent.

While the changes can at times feel overwhelming, embracing the transformation and embracing the new person you are becoming allows you to fully embrace the joys and rewards that accompany parenthood.

Parenthood is an ongoing journey of self-discovery and personal growth, where you continue to learn, adapt, and evolve alongside your child. Embrace the changes, cherish the moments, and find solace in the fact that the loss of your previous identity paves the way for the beautiful journey of becoming a parent.

Sources and Further Reading

• Åsenhed, L., Kilstam, J., Alehagen, S. and Baggens, C., 2014. Becoming a father is an emotional roller coaster–an analysis of first‐time fathers′ blogs. Journal of clinical nursing, 23(9-10), pp.1309-1317.
• Bosteels, S., Van Hove, G. and Vandenbroeck, M., 2012. The roller-coaster of experiences: becoming the parent of a deaf child. Disability & Society, 27(7), pp.983-996.
• Gale, L., 2015. Life is a rollercoaster: Social influences on couples conceiving a child through IVF.
• Hoem, B. and Hoem, J.M., 1996. Sweden’s family policies and roller-coaster fertility. Journal of Population Problems, 52(3-4), pp.1-22.
• Moore, R., 2014. Parenting expect the unexpected. Nurture: the voice of the National Union of Associations for Christian Parent-controlled Schools, 48(1), pp.20-21.
• Weimand, B.M., Birkeland, B., Ruud, T. and Høie, M.M., 2020. “It’s like being stuck on an unsafe and unpredictable rollercoaster”: Experiencing substance use problems in a partner. Nordic Studies on Alcohol and Drugs, 37(3), pp.227-242.